Dearest Readers (aka Mom):

I am sad to announce that the U-verse and I will be parting ways in the next coming weeks. My promotional rate ran out a while ago and since then I’ve been ugly crying at each monthly direct debit from my bank account. My cable/internet bundle price more than doubled after the year was up. The only thing that consoled me was the knowledge that I was able to avoid Game Of Thrones spoilers by watching the HBO East Coast feed. Well, GoT is done for the year and June was going to be the month to make the clean break. Thanks a lot, BBC America, for airing the Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell mini-series. OK, fine, after that. Well, after the last episode of The Seventies on CNN. Then it’s goodbye…after True Detective since my brother needs to watch the last three eps. Then we are really done, U-verse.

Unless your Retention Department can make me a great deal.

But if not, I am ready and willing to go without cable…

…it’s the DVR I’m really going to miss, man. What a genius invention. Series record. Pausing live TV. Taping up to four shows at the same time—

Stay strong, Ratliff.

Just think, I might get out more. Read some more books. Refigure out how to work my DVD/VCR combo. Oh hell, do they still sell VHS tapes?

Let me take this opportunity to give a little thanks to U-verse for the expansion of my incredulity and the introduction to shows I never needed to see. I’m looking at you, TLC.

But it’s time to go…and hopefully get a really good deal to stay. If not, then it is meant to be. No need to be sad*. U-verse and I had a good time. We’ve shared so many quality Tiny House shows together. Watched a World Cup or two. And spent at least five Harry Potter Weekends side by side. It’ll be an end of an era**.

So to celebrate which may be the last time I watch Independence Day (which is airing this evening for no reason since it is so soon after it ran as a marathon on July 4^th), here is my favorite scene that I like to watch over and over. I give you Boomer***:

*Unless they call my bluff and don’t give me a good deal.

**And the start of a new one? Fingers crossed?

***Please. I need Boomer in my life, U-verse. Give me a good deal.

Written by: Mandy Ratliff on July 30, 2015.