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[Kicking Back with Jersey Joe] Jersey Joe’s Top 100 TV Themes (91-100)

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Quentin Tarantino once said in an interview that opening credits in movies are the only mood time a film really gives itself.  That can also be said for the opening credits to TV series.  Along with the actors’ names, you also get a feel for the show thanks to the visuals and the theme song.  Sadly, as TV continues to look for more ways to jam in more ad time, TV themes have mostly gone by the wayside.  I long for the days, when you would watch a show and after many weeks, you would have that theme song stuck in your head.

 

This summer, I’ve decided to list my top 100 favorite TV themes.  This started off as a great idea, but turned out to be a much harder task.  In fact, I had more than 100 on the list.  There were lots that I had to leave behind.

 

To make my top 100, the show opens had to meet several factors.  First, the theme song: if it’s not a catchy tune, then it’s no good.  It doesn’t necessarily something you sing along to, but it has to be something that sets the mood of the series.  Second, it would have to be the visuals.  There’s no sense having an awesome song if you’re going to play it over a black background.  I need to know what the show is about and the theme is the perfect fit.  Lastly, the theme has to accurately reflect the show.  If the show is a comedy, then it needs to have a light and happy theme.

 

Hopefully, you will enjoy this look back at some of your favorite shows and a few that you’ve probably forgotten about.  Along with the showing you the show open, I’ll discuss why I liked the theme, and offer my own insights into the show.  In some cases, I will also present alternate versions as well.  For better or worse, some shows would change up their themes during the series run.

 

So, like Casey Casem’s old radio show, here are my top 100 themes.  This week, we’re counting down numbers 100 to 91.

 

#100 MAMA’S FAMILY

Airdates: 1983-1984 (NBC) & 1986-1990 (Syndicated)

 

 

That was a look at the season 1 opening when the show aired on NBC.  When the series was canceled, a year later in entered syndication, where some of the best episodes took place.  When the brought the show back, they dropped the two kids and introduced Bubba, Thelma’s juvenile delinquent grandson.

 

 

I had no idea this is a thing, but apparently there’s a Mama’s Family challenge that was going on YouTube.  The object is to stare directly at the screen while the Mama’s Family theme played and try not to smile.  I don’t know – did this guy succeed?

 

 

#99 MAUDE

Airdates: 1972-1978 (CBS)

 

 

A spin off of All in the Family, Maude gave America our first look at Bea Arthur.  Her priceless facial reactions made her the perfect choice to lead her next, more successful show The Golden Girls less than a decade later.

 

I love how this open give you a look at a 1970’s New York City.  You get to see the now demolished West Side Highway, which I am ever so thankful that I never had to drive on!

 

One of the craziest things I’ve ever done was to memorize this song after my friend Mike’s 30th birthday party.  It seemed like a good idea at the time and I stayed up for hours doing so… in full disclosure, I got talked into it after a few too many libations in a Hoboken bar.  Hey, I blew his mind when I came to work the following Monday and sang it word for word!  Still, that story’s not as funny as what The Family Guy did to the Maude credits…

 

http://youtu.be/fjWhDLbr3MA

 

#98 THE HOGAN FAMILY

Airdates: 1986-1990 (NBC) 1990-1991 (CBS)

 

http://youtu.be/kjtGXztRJuc

 

It’s the show that had three different titles and the main star walk off the show.

 

When it first aired on NBC, the series was known as Valerie starring Valerie Harper.  Yes, Rhoda from Mary Tyler Moore.  She got into a dispute with the producers and walked off the show at the end of season two.  She obviously ticked off the NBC executives as well, so they killed her off!

 

For season three, they brought in Sandy Duncan to take care of her mourning family and re-titled the show first as Valerie’s Family: The Hogans and then simply to The Hogan Family.

 

The expression on Sandy Duncan’s face after she catches that ball in the second shot drives me nuts.  What would she have looked like if it had bounced off of her head?

 

Here’s a look at the same show open during the first season Valerie Harper year.  Enjoy the bonus commercial for Chic jeans!

 

 

#97 AMERICAN GLADIATORS

Airdates: 1989-1996 (Syndicated)

 

 

How about those original American Gladiators?  I would have given anything to sit in the audience of this show back in the day.  I’m sure I would have died running around in those giant spheres or the final Eliminator, but it would have been fun to shoot Nerf balls at the Gladiator for points.

 

NBC tried to bring this show back in 2008 during the WGA Writer’s Strike, because there’s no script to write.  That version, with Hulk Hogan, had very little resemblance of this fun original and flat out stunk.  It was only on the air for a few disappointing episodes.

 

At one point, they tried to bring this as a live show to the Las Vegas Strip, but it got tied up in legal matters.  There was a dinner show, similar to Medieval Times, featuring many of the original Gladiators that ran for less than a year in Orlando, Florida during 1996.

 

#96 HOME IMPROVEMENT

Airdates: 1991-1999 (ABC)

 

 

This was a look at the season two and three opening credits for Home Improvement.  This was the longest version, before they started cutting back as well to shove more ad time in.

 

The open changed several times over the years as the kids got older, but generally kept the same basic theme.

 

Remember when Baywatch babe Pamela Anderson got her start at Tim’s first assistant on Tool Time?  No wonder he grunted!

 

#95 SEAQUEST DSV

Airdates: 1993-1996 (NBC)

 

 

It was Star Trek under the sea and NBC was looking to cash in.  This show had a ton of potential, but sadly was a victim of constant network tinkering.  Like why did they blow up the ship at the end of the first season?

 

For the third and final season, they picked the whole ship up and put it on an alien planet to add even more sci-fi adventure that just didn’t work.  The show got so bad, that the captain Roy Scheider quit after season 2.

 

#94 NEW GIRL

Airdates: 2011-present (FOX)

 

 

This second version of the New Girl theme is 100% better than the first.  While the song is still sung by Zooey Deschanel, the original opening had the cast sitting on a coach over a white cyc, while Zooey just kind of danced around.

 

This is one of the few sit-coms on TV right now that still has a show open.  Occasionally, they will cut it short or not use it at all, when an episode runs a little long.

 

The original working title for the show was Chicks & Dicks.  I can see why that didn’t clear the FOX censors.

 

#93 THE OC

Airdates: 2003-2007 (FOX)

 

 

While I was not a regular viewer of this show, I really liked the opening credits.  The show used a great deal of indie rock songs and did the same for the opening.  Phantom Planet’s California, still gets an occasional play on the radio and at sporting events regarding California teams.

 

The graphics, cast shots, and b-roll almost make you feel as though you are sitting on a West Coast beach!

 

The credits changed only very slightly throughout the four seasons.

 

#92 PUNKY BREWESTER

Airdates: 1984-1986 (NBC) 1986-1987 (Syndication)

 

 

As a kid, a remember watching this show, and thinking how cool Punky was with all of her adventures.  Now, as an adult, I realize some of the episodes have some very dark tones such as the fight over adoption, drug use, and even sex!

 

I haven’t seen an episode of this series in decades, but that theme song is still stuck in my head.  At least this song does the trick.  By the time you get to the end, you completely understand that an old single guy adopts a rag tag orphan girl.  That’s a sure recipe for 80’s sitcom success!

 

#91 TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES

Airdates: 1987 (pilot only, Syndication) 1998-1993 (Syndication) 1990-1996 (CBS)

 

 

Heroes in a half shell – turtle power!

 

They were actually singing this theme one night last year on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon and it instantly brought back memories.  As a kid, this show was on weekday afternoons and also Saturday mornings!  That’s a lot of turtle power!

 

Another great theme song with another great show open.  You knew exactly what you were getting into seeing the start of this show.

 

I always wanted to dress up as one of the turtles for Halloween, but sadly never have.

 

I did learn in doing research for this blog that when the show aired in Europe, it had to be retitled Teenage Mutant Hero Turtles due to controversy over some of the weapons used on the show.  Check out the altered open and really bad editing.

 

http://youtu.be/iaNc-fLwXhQ

 

But, with all of their fighting skills, why couldn’t they ever defeat Shredder?

 

A new version of this series showed up on FOX, CW, and Nickelodeon a decade later and was only vaguely related to this series.

 

THE 411

 

What: TV Theme Songs

 

Use: themes used to open a TV series or cartoon

 

Purpose: introduce main cast and introduce audience to the theme of the series

 

Numbers reviewed: 91 – 100

 

JERSEY JOE RECOMMENDS:

 

I hope you enjoyed the look at these first nine themes.  I had to disqualify one of my original picks, The Mary Tyler Moore Show.  It seems copies of this open have been taken down from YouTube over a copyright issue with the composer.  I’ve found many episodes uploaded to the site, but without the opening credits.

 

Kick back again with me next week when we take a look at numbers 81-99.  We’ll have girls in bikinis, a guy who can do anything with duct tape, and the theme song for a judge!

 

I don’t own any of the rights to these, nor did I upload them to YouTube.  This blog is presented for educational and informational purposes.

Image credit – James Vaughn

[Kicking Back with Jersey Joe] Jersey Joe’s Year Four Rewind

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Here it is – my fourth official season finale!  True, I’ve only been writing on Been and Going since it launched about a year ago, but this blog has now been online for four complete years.  It all started 182 editions ago on fierceandnerdy.com.  As my season wraps, I always go back and update what I’ve written about.  So, get ready as we take a quick look back…

You can click on the title of each blog to check out the original post.

THE JUDGE JUDY SLOT MACHINE

Blogumn #134 – April 12, 2013

 

This blogumn looked at the new Judge Judy slot machines that had just hit casino floors.  At the time, the machines were highly popular and can still be found in most major casinos.

 

The popularity of this slot machine continues today.  During a recent visit to Atlantic City, there was always somebody playing them and still had a line of spectators watching at both banks of machines I found at Bally’s and the Golden Nugget.

burgertime2-225x300

BURGER TIME: THE ORIGINAL HELL’S KITCHEN

Blogumn #139 – May 17, 2013

 

This blogumn took a look at one of my favorite video games of all time, Burger Time.  The game is simple, you are the chef and your job is to assemble hamburgers in a crazy kitchen where the ingredients have come to life and are after you!

 

I love to play this game at Barcade, in Jersey City, New Jersey.  Barcade is a cross between a bar and arcade that thankfully, is for adults only.

 

Sadly, the machine has gone missing from this location.  Barcade is in the process of opening a new location in Manhattan and I can only hope that it will end up there.  Both locations will only be a PATH train ride away.

burgerkingribsandwich2

BURGER KING RIB SANDWICH

Blogumn #140 – May 21, 2013

 

In this special edition, I discussed the new Burger King Rib Sandwich that the fast food chain had added to their menu.  It was their first big jab at McDonald’s by creating their own version of McDonald’s legendary McRib.

 

The Burger King Rib Sandwich was added to last summer’s menu and I judged it to be far superior to the McRib.  While it did sell well, the sandwich finished its summer run and was removed from BK’s menu early last fall.  Sadly, it has not returned and there have been no plans announced to bring it back.  I hope that Burger King reconsiders and makes this a permanent addition to their menu.

borgatacasinoonline2

NEW JERSEY ANTES UP TO ONLINE GAMBLING

Blog #157 – December 5, 2013

 

In a little over a week after online gambling was legalized and officially launched in New Jersey, I tested out a few sites to see what all the hype was about.

 

Like it or hate it, online gambling has generated extra revenue for both the state and the Atlantic City casinos who took part in it.  Sadly, the state overestimated how much revenue would be brought in.

 

The state was estimating that $10.6 million would be earned in just six weeks.  The total earned was $7.3 million, which is still a success.  The revenue earned from legal online gambling has saw steady growth from January – March, with April being the first to see a slight decline in the amount wagered.  The state still expects continued growth moving forward.

acsands26

THE FINAL MOMENTS OF THE SANDS ATLANTIC CITY

Blog #162 – January 9, 2014

 

This blog took a look back at the night I was there for the final moments of the Sands casino in Atlantic City, New Jersey.  With my old camera phone, I captured the final blackjack hand and security ushering everyone out, while the slots were being turned off.  The casino was closed for a project, that was to build a mega casino and hotel in it’s place.  Sadly, the economy went bust and the project never happened.

 

The Madison House, a hotel that is located across the street from the site, was once used as an additional hotel tower for the Sands.  It closed when the casino did, but finally reopened this past January.  Sadly, Tripadvisor reviews of the initial opening were terrible.  Guests complained of slow elevators, filthy and outdated rooms, and a strong cigarette smoke smell.  Many guests have commented that a renovation has begun and hopefully this will be a step in the right direction for the historic property.  I plan to check it out as some point in the future.

 

The Sands site still sits unused, outside of a light up artist installation.

judgejoetipsy

JUDGE JOE BROWN DRUNK

Blog #169 – February 27, 2014

 

In this hilarious video I found online, we get to see TV’s Judge Joe Brown all liquored up and hitting on a group of women at some kind of resort.  Joe even makes fun of his old TV show.

 

Since then, Judge Joe has gone back to being a lawyer in Memphis, Tennessee.  Back in March, during a court child support preceding, he went on a tirade against the judge and it got him thrown in jail.  (You can hear TMZ’s copy of the court room audio here.) He was sentenced to five days, but was released in a couple of hours.  He is also running for District Attorney in Shelby County.  Could it have all been a publicity stunt?

kickingbackwithjerseyjoe

THE 411

 

Name: Kicking Back with Jersey Joe

 

What: weekly blog on beenandgoing.com

 

Time: new editions post Thursday at Noon Eastern / 9am Pacific

 

JERSEY JOE RECOMMENDS:

 

Thanks again for all your support and for checking out my blog.  I love how we get to chat like this each week.  As always, feel free to comment below each post or reach out to me on twitter @jerseyjoe50.

 

This summer, I have a quite a treat for all of you TV fans.  Starting with next week’s blog, I am going to post 10 at a time, my 100 favorite TV show theme songs.  You’ll get to see show opens from some of your favorite series and a few that I’m sure you’ve forgotten.  Don’t miss it – starting next week!

 

Image credits – Chris Marquardt, Kathrina Birkenbach,

[Kicking Back with Jersey Joe] Khan Finally Gets Revenge on Admiral Kirk

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Of all the Star Trek movies ever produced, the second film Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan is generally regarded by fans as the best.  Khan, a generically engineered human seeks revenge on Admiral Kirk after stranding him on a dead planet on the original TV series.  Kirk and Khan get into several epic battles during the film, but this version I found on YouTube was sadly, not part of the original feature.  Had the two battled in this manor, perhaps the end result would have been different?

 

Khan is a super intelligent human; it was engrained in him as part of his genetic engineering when he was created back on Earth.  His “superior intellect,” as he calls it, allows him to be a superior tactician.  It’s this intellect that helped him to become the largest ruler back on Earth and narrowly be defeated by Captain Kirk in their first encounter on the season one episode.

 

But, as you will see in this video, it’s not phasers or photon torpedoes that Khan uses against Kirk. It becomes a mind battle!

 

http://youtu.be/0xtY_k86FBU

 

So, do you think Khan is the winner?

 

THE 411

 

Film: Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan

 

Release date: June 4, 1982

 

Rating: PG-13

 

Starring: William Shatner as Admiral Kirk and Ricardo Montalban as Khan

kirk1

JERSEY JOE RECOMMENDS:

 

I happened to be surfing through YouTube the other week and came across this.

 

I love when fans add fun gags to already existing films and upload them to YouTube.  Hopefully, it won’t get taken down due to copyright violations, but let’s thank Tom Gigliotti for his awesome work on this.  The video has been online since May 2008 and has scored almost 140,000 views.

[Kicking Back with Jersey Joe] A Chicken Big Mac?

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Just about all of us have had a meal at McDonald’s at one point in our lives.  Everyone is equally familiar with their signature Big Mac sandwich.  Those two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onion, on a sesame seed bun.  The sandwich has gone unchanged for half a century, but now thanks to competition – another restaurant is trying to “one up” the Golden Arches, by replacing those beef patties – with chicken!

 

The McDonald's Big Mac

The McDonald’s Big Mac

The Big Mac was developed by a Pennsylvania McDonald’s franchisee in the 1950’s.  The special or secret sauce that makes up the sandwich is rarely used by McDonald’s on any other products.

 

In fact, it has happened only twice.

 

McDonald’s once sold a Mac Jr., which was a single cheeseburger, topped with the Mac sauce, lettuce, and pickles.  For a brief time in 2011, a Mac Snack wrap was also sold which featured half of a hamburger patty, the secret sauce, cheese, lettuce, pickles, and onion wrapped up in a flour tortilla.

 

This year, McDonald’s has expanded their Quarter Pounder sandwich line by offering a new Bacon Clubhouse burger which features a quarter pound beef patty, cheese, bacon, lettuce, tomato, red onion, and the Big Mac secret sauce on a special Kaiser roll.  This is the first time the sauce has ever been used on different burger.  McDonalds also has a chicken option, where you can get chicken instead of beef, but with the secret sauce the taste, just isn’t very good.

 

The Big Mac is sold at most worldwide McDonald’s locations, but there are several variations, including versions that replace the beef with a chicken patty and more.  (read more about the international versions here).  But, none of these have ever been sold in the United States.

 

McDonald’s has been facing some stiff competition lately in a fast food burger war, by their greatest opponent – Burger King.

 

The Burger King Whopper sandwich.

The Burger King Whopper sandwich.

Burger King has its own signature sandwich, The Whopper.  But, they’ve fired a torpedo at the Golden Arches by creating their Big Mac knockoff – the Big King.

 

The Big King was first introduced back in the 1990’s, but was reformulated and only sold for a limited time.  However, it made a big return last year worldwide and is now once again assembled identically to a Big Mac.

 

For my money, the Big King just tastes better.  I like the flavor or BK’s flame broiled patties and I think their sauce is just a hint more subtle.  I think you can swap Big Mac sauce for regular tartar sauce and not know the difference.  BK’s sauce is more similar to Thousand Island salad dressing. (which, maybe it is?)

 

The Chicken Big King.

The Chicken Big King.

Burger King is going for round 2 in the burger war, by adding a chicken version to their menu.  Introduced a couple weeks ago, America can now feast on the Chicken Big King.

 

I decided to finally give one a try and Burger King is making it easy by offering two for $5 as a special, which really is a deal.  The sandwich uses two of the basic lightly spiced chicken patty BK uses on their value chicken sandwiches.

 

Once again though, I don’t think the special sauce works with chicken.  It tastes like a fish sandwich with tarter sauce.

 

That was the same issue I had with the chicken version of McDonald’s Chicken Clubhouse sandwich (which they gave me by mistake the time I ordered, but I tried it anyway.)  The special sauce just doesn’t work for chicken.  The taste reminds me of the Filet-O-Fish.

IMG_2400

But, for a limited time BK is selling these on their 2 for $5 promotional menu.  These items rotate on a regular basis, so if you are interested in trying one, I wouldn’t wait around that long.  The sandwich is sold for a limited time only.

 

But, thanks to the fast food war, Americans can now experience what diners in other countries have for years and that’s the chicken version of the Big Mac or Big King.

 

The Chicken Big King contains 660 calories and 37g fat.

IMG_2397

THE 411

 

Name: Chicken Big King

 

What: chicken version of McDonald’s Big Mac or Burger Kings Big King sandwiches

 

Where served: Burger King restaurants worldwide

 

Introduced: 2014

 

Availability: Limited Time Only

 

JERSEY JOE RECOMMENDS:

 

While I again applaud Burger King for trying and testing a new sandwich, I say skip this one.  You’re better off just going for the regular Big King.

 

Image credits – Don, Chandra Marsono

[Kicking Back with Jersey Joe] Everybody Loves Pancakes!

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Growing up, my grandmother would cook me her own spin on pancakes called a palacinki.  Instead of a traditional pancake, it was rolled up on a plate, served in groups of three, and filled with jelly, then topped with syrup, and sometimes chocolate.  She told me that she learned to make that from her mother, who from Slovakia.  (Yes, I know they’re basically a crepe.)  When I was home a few months ago, she again whipped up her mouthwatering treat and it had me wondering: what are pancakes like in other countries around the world?

palacinke

A palacinke, or palacinki (there are numerous spellings) for this succulent treat!

Pancakes, the delicious fluffy treats we all scarf down by the millions at breakfast.  They are a cheap breakfast to cook in the home and a big money maker for restaurants.  Made with just a few ingredients, they can start your day off right and their history dates back to before Christ.

 

American Pancakes are flat and thin round cakes prepared in a pan or on a griddle.  We generally eat them for breakfast with fruit, syrup, or butter.  Here pancakes usually use a baking agent to make them rise, but many other countries eat them flat as a crepe.  The basic shape and serving of pancakes varies around the world.

 

Buttermilk pancakes.

Classic buttermilk pancakes.

The history of pancakes dates back to a previous millennium.  The Ancient Greeks first served pancakes as early as 5 BC and were made the same basic way as they are prepared today with wheat flour, olive oil, honey, and curdled milk.

 

But, some places really have a unique spin on the recipe.

 

Injera

Injera

In Africa, most countries eat the pancake as more of a flatbread with a meal.  Here, they do not use yeast, which keeps the pastry as flat as possible.  It is also served with most meals as side bread.  In Ethiopia, pancakes serve as both a plate and a side dish.  Known as injera, the pancake holds a stew (or salad where they don’t eat meat) and soaks up the juices.  The meal does not end until the entire injera is consumed.

pancakes3

In China, pancakes are made with dough, instead of a batter.  In Japan, they are made from egg, flour, and cabbage.

 

In India, pancakes are made without any rising agents and are prepared either sweet or salty.  The salty version is served with cottage cheese.

 

In Indonesia, they are made with rice flour and coconut milk.

 

In Malaysia and Singapore, you can find pancakes that include sweet corn!

 

In Denmark, pancakes are served in the shape of a sphere.  In parts of Germany, they are also served with soup.

 

Icelandic pancakes

Icelandic pancakes

Iceland has an unusual way of preparing pancakes.  There, they try to get the cake as thin as possible and will use the same pan over and over to prepare them.  It is strongly encouraged not to wash the pan.  They will also use pancakes as bread for a sandwich.

 

In Spain, the ingredients for a pancake can include flour, milk, eggs, or blood!  Yes, blood!  The blood style is served during a pig slaughter feast.

 

Pancake restaurants in the Netherlands are extremely popular.  They will serve giant pancakes with bacon, sausage, ham, cheese, or apples baked inside.

 

In many countries, pancakes even have their own day!  Shrove Tuesday, is the day before Lent where the faithful can gorge themselves all they want and to use up the fatty ingredients.  The celebration is similar to Mardi Gras and is celebrated in Canada, United Kingdom, Ireland, New Zealand, and Australia.  It is also known as Pancake Tuesday or Fat Tuesday… doesn’t the last one sound familiar?

An International House of Pancakes restaurant, in S. Portland, Maine as pictured in the 1970's.

An International House of Pancakes restaurant, in S. Portland, Maine as pictured in the 1970’s.

Pancake runs are also part of the Shove Tuesday celebrations.  Usually held for charity, most of these runs feature women who must toss their pancake in the air and catch it in a frying pan as they run.  This all started back in 1444, when an English housewife heard the bells of her local church and she ran out of the house with her apron on and a frying pan still cooking the pancake to get to the service.

 

Cooking up pancakes on a stove top griddle.

Cooking up pancakes on a stove top griddle.

THE 411

 

Name: pancakes

 

What: soft, cake style pastries served for breakfast in the US, but served as part of meal worldwide

 

JERSEY JOE RECOMMENDS:

 

I absolutely love pancakes.  Besides, my grandmother’s awesome home cooking, Café Metro, a restaurant on New York’s Upper East Side, has some of the best.  Their recipe uses a hint of lemon flavoring in the batter.

 

Pancakes with a hint of lemon, served with bacon at Cafe Metro, New York City.

Pancakes with a hint of lemon, served with bacon at Cafe Metro, New York City.

Another favorite is Hash House a Go Go, with three locations in Las Vegas.  Their pancakes are massive and have a great flavor to cure your Vegas hangover.  It’s almost impossible to finish a serving in one sitting.  If I were local, I would probably take mine in a To Go box, but being a tourist, I don’t think they would sit well in a hotel room.  Hash House a Go Go has a location in The Quad hotel and casino on the Strip and another in The Plaza hotel and casino downtown on Fremont Street.  They also have restaurants in San Diego, Chicago, Orlando, suburban Las Vegas, Reno, and at the Foxwoods Casino in Connecticut.

 

Image credits – Martin, Davide e Paola, Addison Berry, Caleb SconosciutoSnugg LePup, chotda, Allen, Dvortygirl

The Two State Lottery Challenge: The Rematch [Kicking Back with Jersey Joe]

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Last year, I put the New York Lottery and the New Jersey Lottery to the test.  I wanted to find out which state’s instant scratch off tickets paid off the most – The Empire State or The Garden State.  Using the same amount of cash and a random selection of tickets, I joined the ranks of millions who are scratching off to win big bucks on these instant games.

 

Instant lottery scratch off tickets: they’re meant to play a fast game and to make a quick buck.  It’s portable form of gambling that states have relied on for extra revenue since the 1980’s.  (You can read about my original discussion of instant lottery games here). The instant games are more popular than ever, to the point where states are now installing vending machines to attract commuters to play on the go.

 

Lottery player uses the vending machine to purchase scratch off tickets at the 33rd Street subway station in New York City.

Lottery player uses the vending machine to purchase scratch off tickets at the 33rd Street subway station in New York City.

Last year, I invested $55 and stopped first at the New York Lottery vending machine at the 33rd Street Herald Square station in New York City.  I put $30 into the machine and randomly selected a number of tickets.  Once I got off the PATH in Jersey City, I stopped at a local newsstand and had them randomly select tickets with the remaining $25.

 

After over 40 minutes of scratching, the New Jersey Lottery $25 investment earned me $42, while my $30 New York Lottery investment earned me only $4.  I declared New Jersey the winner and the whole experiment left me with a net loss of $9.

 

You can read the full report of last year’s challenge here.

 

Now, these are supposed to be random games of chance, so to be completely fair, I decided that another challenge would be needed and I did just that last week.

 

Once again, I stopped at the New York Lottery vending machine at the 33rd Street station and deposited $25.  I again picked one large $5 ticket and then randomly chose a selection of lower denomination games.  Once back off the PATH in Jersey City, I again stopped by the same newsstand and had the clerk select $25 in random games, with the only rule being that I needed one $5 ticket to match what I had purchased in New York City.

ny lottery tickets

Upon arriving home, I examined the stack of tickets and here’s what I got:

 

From the New York Lottery – 12 tickets

 

$5 Million Dollar Money Clip

$3 Spin 3

$2 Lucky 8’s

$2 Lucky 8’s

$2 Lucky 8’s

$2 Happy Birthday

$2 Win $1,000 a Week for Life

$2 Win $1,000 a Week for Life

$2 Win $1,000 a Week for Life

$1 Loose Change

$1 Amazing 8’s

$1 5x Cash

 

nj lottery tickets

From the New Jersey Lottery – 10 tickets

 

$5 Money Match

$3 Power Play Crossword

$3 Zuma

$2 Love to Win

$2 Classic Bingo

$2 Big Money Spectacular

$2 Win $1,000 a Week for Life

$2 10x Money

$2 Fire & Ice

$2 Hit $50’s

 

Since there were more tickets in the New York Lottery stack; I went with those, first.

 

I started with the lower denomination tickets and first up was the $1 5x Cash.  To win, all I had to do was match 3 symbols.  And…. a loser.

 

Then went with the $1 Amazing 8’s.  Same deal, match three 8’s and win.  Too bad, I lost again.

 

Next up was the $1 Loose Change.  This game was a little different.  The player is presented with six boxes containing coins.  After scratching off the six boxes, the total of what’s inside must go over $1 to win a prize.  Mine did!  My total was $1.05.  I scratched the prize box to reveal I had won my $1 back!

ny lottery loose change

Finally, a winner!

 

Next up, was the three $2 Win $1,000 A Week for Life games. I was really hoping for a big win on this one.  I could use a grand handed to me every week!  Who couldn’t?

ny lottery winner 12

These tickets contain two games each.  The first game is a classic beat the house game.  The player is given a number, if the player number is higher than the house number – you win the prize shown on the line.  On my first ticket – a hit!  I bet the house 12 – 7 and won $2!

ny lottery winner 5

The second game on the ticket is the classic New York Lottery standard of matching three like dollar amounts.  On the next two tickets, I did just that winning $2 and another $5!

 

Four winners in a row!  Things were starting to look up for the Empire State!

 

I then went for the $2 Happy Birthday… another dud.

 

I then had 3 of the $2 Lucky 8’s games.  In this game, you scratch off the player area which features a number and a prize amount.  If your number matches one of two house numbers, you win the prize.  If an 8x symbol appears, you win 8x the prize!  A coin picture also denotes an instant prize win.

ny lottery winner 8x win

I scratched the first two tickets – and nothing.  Finally, I went for the third ticket.  Right away, I matched the house number of 16 and won $10!  Further down the line, I uncovered an 8x symbol with a $5 prize that paid off $40!  That’s a total of $50!  I’ve never won that much on a scratch off lottery ticket in my life!

 

I still had two of the biggest tickets to go.

 

Next was a $3 Spin 3.  This game was kind of lame, there’s no spinning involved.  You are presented 10 different games.  All you have to do is match three like symbols in each game to win the prize.  Think of it as a slot machine on a scratch off card.  It didn’t matter, I got squat.

 

Finally the big $5 Million Dollar Money Clip game.  Match your number to one of the house numbers and win that prize.  A 10x awards 10 times the prize and a coin icon wins that prize.  Sadly, I got nothing here.

 

So, for my $25 New York Lottery investment, I walked away with $60!

nj lottery 50s ticket

Then it was time to do battle with the New Jersey Lottery.  I started in the same order with the lowest tickets first and that was a $2 Hit $50s.  (New Jersey doesn’t seem to offer $1 scratch off games.)  Again, you have to match your number to one of the house numbers and win the prize shown.  I matched with a 12 and won $2!  Things were already looking up once again for the Garden State.

 

Next was a $2 Fire and Ice game that was definitely icy cold.  Nothing.  Same deal for $2 10x Money, $2 Win $1,000 a Week for Life, and the $2 Big Money Spectacular.  The win $1,000 a Week for Life is a popular game that is available in many different states.  I’ve played that in Pennsylvania in the past.

 

A New Jersey Lottery Bingo scratch off instant game ticket.

A New Jersey Lottery Bingo scratch off instant game ticket.

Now it was on to the $2 Classic Bingo.  This game took a long time to play.  You are presented with 25 Bingo Ball numbers on the left.  You scratch them off one by one and play the numbers on one of your four Bingo cards.  Payouts are different for each card and each way you get a bingo.  There are 12 different payouts that are printed next to each game.  After scratching off all the ball numbers, I had to transfer them to the game board.  After 10 minutes or so, I had a diagonal bingo on card 2 and that scored me $2.  Had that been on card four, that payout would have been $5.

 

I then went for the $2 Love to Win, which was a classic match the house number scratcher.  No love here, I got nothing.

 

Next up was a $3 Zuma ticket.  Have you ever played this game online?  In the online game, you have to shoot at multicolored balls rolling along a track to make them disappear before reaching the end.  I was surprised to see how well this turned this into a scratch off game.

 

It was one of the more unusual layouts.  You are presented a circular game board with six games of balls presented in groups of three.  If your three balls match the color, you win.  Sadly, mine did not.  It was a great nod to the online game, though.

 

Next was the $3 Power Play Crossword and this thing took a long time to complete.  You uncover 10 house letters.  The player is then presented with a completed crossword puzzle.  You task is to take the 10 house letters and scratch them off anywhere they appear in the puzzle.  If you complete three words, you win a prize.  The prizes go up with the more words you completely uncover.  A pay table is posted on the back.  It was useless to me; I only rubbed off two words.

nj lottery money watch

Lastly, was the $5 Money Match game.  Same deal as many other tickets.  You get 5 house prize amounts.  If you match one, you win.  If you match an amount, but yours is in green color, you win double the amount.  Find a money bag and win $50.  Find a green money bag and win $100!  I matched and won $5.

 

So, the total won in New Jersey from my initial $25 investment was only $9.  I lost $16 to the Garden State.

 

Many of the New Jersey games that I played were quite involved.  Instead of just finding three like symbols as in most games, here you are required to use some thought.  Matching the letters in the Crosswords game took some time as did the Bingo game.  So, if you’re looking for instant gratification with matching three symbols, then look for the simpler games as some of the choices can get quite complex.  The bonus with selecting one of these tickets from a vending machine is that you can take a closer look at what’s required before making your selection.  It’s a little hard to do when there’s a ton of people in line at the bodega waiting to play their Powerball numbers and pay for a jug of milk.

 

The total time I spent scratching 22 tickets: 41 minutes 31 seconds.  It was thanks to some of those complex games I got from New Jersey that added took extra time.

shards

All the mess left behind after 40+ minutes of scratching off instant lottery tickets.

And here’s a look at the pile of shards left behind from all the scratching.  Wonder if this stuff is toxic?

 

THE 411

 

What: Instant Lottery scratch off games

 

States played: New York, New Jersey

 

Denominations: $1 – $5

scracthed off lottery tickets

JERSEY JOE RECOMMENDS:

 

This was a completely different outcome from the last experiment.  I won $60 in New York and only $9 in New Jersey.  It was that one large hit on the NY ticket that changed everything.  For my $50 investment, I walked away with $69.  Not a life changing amount, but still a winner none the less.

 

The New York Lottery games also offer a second chance drawing.  By going online and entering the code on the ticket, players have a chance to win more random prizes.  That’s a great feature more state lotteries need to adopt.

 

The New Jersey Lottery has also gotten into the ticket vending machine business.  They recently signed a contract with Wawa convenience stores to have machines installed in all of their Jersey locations.  I hope this program extends to other stores throughout the state.  Judging by the popularity of the New York machine at 33rd Street, New Jersey could make some big bucks putting these in train stations targeting commuters who are just standing there waiting.

 

With the second match now complete, the lottery challenge series is tied 1 – 1.  It looks like I will have to do a tiebreaker in the future to find out which state has the loosest scratch off lottery tickets.

 

For more information:

The New York Lottery

The New Jersey Lottery

 

[Kicking Back with Jersey Joe] America’s First Celebrity Chef: Chef Boyardee

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His face dots millions of cans of pasta and pizza sauce.  At one time or another, we’ve all opened up a can of enjoyed his cuisine.  Chef Boyardee, with his tall white cap has fed American’s for almost a century, but he’s not just a face on a can – he’s America’s first real celebrity chef!

 

Ettore “Hector” Boyardee was born in 1897 and arrived in the United States from Piacenza, Italy in the early 1900’s.  It didn’t take him long to find a job and in 1915 at age 17, he was running the kitchen of the Plaza Hotel in New York City.   Having such a prestigious job also scored him the gig of catering President Woodrow Wilson’s wedding reception!

ravioli

He then headed west to work at the Hotel Winton in Cleveland, Ohio.  While working there, he met and married his wife.  But, he was tired of working for others and wanted a restaurant of his own.  In 1924, he opened Il Giardino d’Italia and his cooking became the talk of the town.  Hungry Clevelanders would line up for hours around the block to get in the door.  His food became so popular; he would package his spaghetti and meatballs in milk jars for customers to take home.

 

After making a good bit of dough with his take home meals, he decided he could sell his pasta to the masses.  Only four years later in 1928, he and his brothers would create the Chef Boyardee Company and move to Milton, Pennsylvania, (now just a few minutes off of Interstate 80.)  The central Pennsylvania climate allowed for more fresh tomatoes and mushrooms to be used.  They also dropped the Italian spelling to make it easier for Americans to pronounce.  At his plant, he invents a meatball making machine that’s still in use today!

 

Assortment of Chef Boyardee products in the canned goods aisle in a typical grocery store.

Assortment of Chef Boyardee products in the canned goods aisle in a typical grocery store.

His products are such a hit that they caught the attention of the U.S. Military.  During World War II, his company was contracted to produce canned meals for the troops overseas.  The plant goes into full production 24/7 to keep up.  His war efforts earn him a Gold Star, the highest honor a civilian can earn.

 

After the war, instead of cutting back on production, he sold the plant to American Home Products so that everyone could keep their jobs.  He continued on as a consultant and also starred in commercials for his products.  It was these commercials that can officially give him the title of America’s first celebrity chef.

 

 

Long before Gordon Ramsay, Bobby Flay, Emeril, and Giada de Laurenties became fixtures on our TV’s, Chef Boyardee was starring in commercials for his products since the days of black and white television.  He generally went off the air when he retired in 1978, but anyone who grew up before that time, knew who Chef Boyardee was, and not just from his line in the grocery store.

 

 

In 2000, ConAgra Foods of Omaha, Nebraska purchases the product line and they continue to manufacture his canned goods to this day.  To celebrate the chef, the company erected a statue in his honor at the Omaha plant.

 

Chef Boyardee statue at the ConAgra plant in Omaha, Nebraska.

Chef Boyardee statue at the ConAgra plant in Omaha, Nebraska.

THE 411

 

Name: Chef Boyardee

 

What: America’s first celebrity chef

 

Active: 1924-1978

 

Known for: canned product line in grocery stores

 

Website: www.chefboyardee.com

 

Chef Boyardee microwave meal.

Chef Boyardee microwave meal.

JERSEY JOE RECOMMENDS:

 

I was always a fan on his ABC’s and 123’s with meatballs and regularly keep a can in the cupboard.  Not only are they good, but also a must have in case of an emergency or long term power failure.  As a kid, this was my go to food when we would lose power after a big snowstorm in the country.  They are good either heated or right out the can!  The Chef Boyardee spaghetti sauce was always so much better than the rival, Spaghetti-O’s.  To me, Spaghetti-O’s always tasted like the can.

 

I had no idea he was a real guy until I just happened to come across a random fact on the web.  I always figured he was just a mascot kind of like Mr. Clean or the Jolly Green Giant.  It’s neat to see that he was indeed real and is a true American success story.  I just hope at some point they bring back his old Tic Tac Toe’s or Pac Man Pasta!  (Yes, I used to eat those as a child.)

 

Like the old commercials say “Thank Goodness for Chef Boyardee!”

Check out this guy's awesome Halloween costume... yes, he's a can of Chef Boyardee ravioli!

Check out this guy’s awesome Halloween costume… yes, he’s a can of Chef Boyardee ravioli!

Image credits – Michael Carian, cfinke, Friscocali, Jimmy Emerson DVM, Roadsidepictures & Scutter

[Kicking Back with Jersey Joe] Uncovering a Hidden Bar Inside New York’s Grand Central Terminal

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New York City – thousands of bars and restaurants dot the island, catering to both hard working locals and tourists alike.  Grand Central Terminal is one of the world’s busiest and most famous train stations.  The terminal itself holds many secrets, from a hidden train car for presidents to a chamber where you can hear someone talk from 20 feet away!  It also holds a secret saloon!  One that you would never know is there, unless you walk right into it.

 

Hundreds of trains and thousands of passengers that pass through the terminal each day are served by dozens of shops and restaurants inside the long, winding passages.  One of the most famous is the Oyster Bar restaurant.  Known for fresh seafood, the restaurant is a popular place to dine in the city and can even been seen in the opening credits of Saturday Night Live.

 

The main entrance to the Oyster Bar Restaurant in Grand Central Terminal, New York City

The main entrance to the Oyster Bar Restaurant in Grand Central Terminal, New York City

The Oyster Bar opened along with the terminal, itself in 1913.

 

But, hidden off to the side is a little known New York secret… the Oyster Bar contains a separate bar/dining area known as the Oyster Bar Saloon.

 

Inside the dimly lit Oyster Bar Saloon

Inside the dimly lit Oyster Bar Saloon

I had never heard of the place, but a co-worker who frequents Grand Central discovered it and invited me along for a trip.

 

The entrance is located along the back side wall of the Oyster Bar restaurant.

The entrance is located along the back side wall of the Oyster Bar restaurant.

To find it, you must enter the main Oyster Bar, located atop the ramp to the dining concourse.  Once inside, make an immediate right and walk all the way to the side wall.  Then, make a left and the door will be located a few feet in front of you to the right.  A simple sign marked “Saloon” behind a row of tables with a gold door, marks the way.  Don’t be scared, you will be walking right through the main restaurant full of diners.

 

Upon arriving inside, a hostess will greet you and seat you.  The place is very popular during their 4:30 – 7pm Happy Hour (Monday through Wednesday), where beers go for as low as $4 and oysters for $1.25.  That’s when we arrived and the place was nearly packed.  The Oyster Bar and the Oyster Bar Saloon were both closed for several months, recently for cleaning and renovation.  Both reopened in March and judging by the crowd inside, people are finding it once again.

 

While the Oyster Bar features the same design curves and lights as Grand Central Terminal, the Oyster Bar Saloon features dark red wallpaper, wood paneling, and dim lights.  It’s actually like stepping back into the 1970’s.  I was almost expecting to see people smoking their Lucky Strikes.  Fortunately, New York banned smoking almost a decade ago.

oyster bar saloon 3

We were seated at a table in the middle of the busy restaurant.  The place was nearly packed.  The bar, which I guess could seat around three dozen, was full and there were only a couple of open tables.  There wasn’t a line, but had we gotten there a few minutes later, we would have had to wait.

 

The massive menu.

The massive menu.

As soon as you sit at the table, the waiter is right there, handing you a giant 8 ½ x 14 menu that’s quite overwhelming.  There are well over a hundred items to order, with seafood making up most of the menu.  For those who don’t care for seafood, there’s a small assortment of salads, burgers, and kids meals.  The menu is the same as what you will find in the main Oyster Bar.

 

The server was back in mere minutes and we ordered drinks.  Most draft beers run from $6-$8, which is about a dollar more than most New York bars, but on par with what you’ll find at one of the city’s train stations.

 

There is so much to choose from, we both needed a few more minutes, but was ready by the time the server returned.

 

I went with the Jumbo Lump Maryland Crab Cakes and even though the place was packed, they arrived in about 10 minutes.  The plate featured two large crab cakes, fries, and a saucer of marinara type dipping sauce.

 

The Maryland Crab Cakes.  Gordon Ramsay would approve!

The Maryland Crab Cakes. Gordon Ramsay would approve!

These may have been the best crab cakes I’ve ever had!  Absolutely succulent!  The cakes themselves were full of Maryland crab with a hint of carrots and some other vegetable.  This was no imitation crab – this was real and you could tell by the very fresh taste.  I was nearly full after eating both, but still had my fries.  I never thought marinara sauce would work with crab cakes, but it’s the perfect companion!

 

It was well worth $27!

 

The only bad part is the layout of the seating.  Our table was really small and our two meals, took up most of the room.  There was an assortment of condiments on the table including ketchup, hot sauce, and sea salt.  There’s not a lot of room to move around though, let alone store your bag and coat.  I was on the side nearest to the aisle by the bar, and was constantly getting bumped by both servers and other customers.

 

Being in New York City though, they turn tables around here, fast!  As soon as group gets up, a server immediately goes over and removes the plates, while another sets up fresh plates, linen, and napkins.  Tables do not stay empty for long during the afternoon rush.

oyster bar saloon 6

The servers here are well trained and were right on it as soon as my water, beer, or plate was empty.  And they were extremely knowledgeable about that giant menu!

 

By the time we finished our meals, it was around 8pm, and since Happy Hour was over the place started to quickly clear out.  We decided to move to the long L shaped bar for a few more and to check the place out.

 

The other secret staircase entrance.

The other secret staircase entrance…

...leads to this plain gold door.

…leads to this plain gold door.

To the left of the bar is a white staircase that leads to a second little known entrance/exit.  At the top, a non-discreet gold door leads to a side entrance to the subway and a couple of stores, one of which is a Rite-Aid.  While the door is marked with a small sign, it blends in so well — I can say that I’ve walked down that corridor dozens of times, and never noticed it.

 

Another odd feature of the restaurant is the restrooms.  They are definitely worth a look.  Just past the secret stairway, a door leads to a waiting room with chairs, and two doors.  One marked with a baseball glove for the men’s room and the other marked with a pair of leather lips for the ladies room.  People were hanging out in a waiting area, just sitting there between the doors.  Not sure if they were waiting for someone in the can, but it had the feeling of a 70’s doctor’s office.

 

Last call for the bar is at 9pm.  We got one more drink as the place really started to shut down at 9:30.  We paid and walked back through the main Oyster Bar to exit.

 

Interestingly, while the Oyster Bar serves alcohol, to get to an actual bar, you need to enter the Saloon.  The main restaurant consists of long while community tables and has always been designed that way.  So, while the famous Oyster Bar experience gives you the feelings of the early 20th century, the Oyster Bar Saloon fast forwards a few decades later to the 1970’s.  Either way – you win with some of the freshest seafood in Manhattan!

oyster bar saloon 9

THE 411

 

Name: Oyster Bar Saloon

 

What: hidden bar/restaurant

 

Where: Grand Central Terminal, New York City

 

Cross streets:  42nd Street & Park Avenue

 

Subway connections: 4-5-6-7-S and Long Island Railroad

 

Hours: Monday – Saturday 11:30am – 9:30pm, closed Sunday

 

Price range: a little more than most NYC restaurants

 

All the way to the back and to the left in the main Oyster Bar restaurant, lies the Oyster Bar Saloon.

All the way to the back and to the left in the main Oyster Bar restaurant, lies the Oyster Bar Saloon.

JERSEY JOE RECOMMENDS

 

What a neat place to discover!  The food is great and the ambiance is fun.  It kind of feels like you’re part of a secret club when visiting this place. It does feel a little odd walking right through the Oyster Bar restaurant, while people are dining to find that hidden door, but that makes it part of the fun!

 

I’ll definitely be back and would happily take both friends and out of town visitors.  The prices are a little more than what you would pay at a normal NYC restaurant, but you’re paying for fresh seafood and the location.  The beers are about one to two dollars more.

 

Just be forewarned, it can get a little packed during Happy Hour, and there could be a wait.  Go around 7:30pm, after it’s over, for a better chance at a seat and less of a crowd.  They will seat you until 9pm.

Image credit – Victoria Pickering

[Kicking Back with Jersey Joe] When William Shatner Was a Game Show Host

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He’s battled Klingons, starred in big blockbuster movies, and speaks his lines with big dramatic pauses as he tries to remember the words; but there’s only one William Shatner.  The Canadian born actor loves to perform, but one of his greatest performances has already been mostly forgotten and was mostly missed – and that’s his brief stint as a game show host.

 

In 2006, the ABC television network got into the big money prime time game show craze with their new show Show Me the Money.  The show, which was one giant spectacle and hosted by William Shatner, was sadly cancelled before all the episodes could be broadcast.

williamshatner4

The series featured 13 “Million Dollar Dancers,” who each held a scroll that contained 12 different dollar amounts and one killer card.  The contestant would be presented with a category that started with the answer and three possible choices for questions.  Once they chose a question, they would have to answer, and then select one of the dancers who would reveal the amount of money on their scroll.  If their answer was right, they got the money on the scroll, if it was wrong it was deducted from their bank.  Answering 6 questions either correct or incorrect ended the game.  If the one “killer card” was revealed, the contestant was placed into a sudden death situation, where an incorrect answer immediately ended their game, or a correct answer allowed them to move on.

 

Besides the hot models, the fun part of the show was William Shatner.  Shatner is at his best when dealing with outrageous contestants.  It was nice to see him ad-lib and dance right along with the models.  In fact, the show really didn’t seem to be about the quiz at all, but more of watching Shatner and 13 models dance.  Before going to commercial break, Shatner would scream a random dance to the models and everyone would hilariously dance to break!

 

Here’s a look at the pilot episode of the show:

 

 

Sadly, the show never really caught on and was cancelled.  Seven episodes were taped and five were aired.  The odd thing is that executives at ABC at first thought this show would work and ordered an additional 7 episodes, but then quickly changed their minds, and cancelling the show a week later after episode 5.

 

The ratings were so bad, when the Game Show Network aired the reruns; they had to cancel the show again after only reairing the first two episodes.  The final two episodes have never and most likely won’t ever see the light of day.

williamshatner1

THE 411

 

What: Show Me the Money

 

Type: TV game show

 

Host: William Shatner

 

Airdates: November 14 – December 13, 2006

 

Number of episodes: 5, plus 2 unaired

 

Network: ABC

 

JERSEY JOE RECOMMENDS

 

The concept was corny and over the top, but Shatner made it work.  ABC should have moved the show to another night and gave it another shot.  This could have also worked as Saturday night network TV filler, instead of on a tough Tuesday night with big time competition from the other networks.  I could see this on playing in the background at a packed bar on a Saturday night, getting laughs.

 

Very little video of this show is still online, so take a moment, and laugh at the hilarious first episode while you can, because as the ratings show most people missed it the first time around.

 

“Ladies, let’s salsa!”williamshatner2